The Top 10 reasons to be concerned about the USS Voyager: by David Letterman.

  1. The crew are big fans of the HMS Bounty.
  2. Prime Directive? We don't need no stinking Prime Directive!
  3. It will be revealed that the new captain is one of Mudd's women.
  4. The original script named the captain Ginger, and the first mate Gilligan.
  5. Delta Quadrant, there goes the neighborhood.
  6. Its just another warranty claim on the Starfleet ship yards.
  7. The new first officer (native American and former terrorist) just found out the Captain is a descendant of Custer.
  8. The holographic doctor is a leftover from the Clinton healthcare plan.
  9. They might get home. Remember what happened the last time a craft named Voyager came home (it spawned a terrible movie).
  10. The defense systems are controlled by a Pentium processor. (cha-ching)